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Funny Quotations
Resource for Funny Quotations with Searchable quotes, Sayings by Subject, Authors, quotes screensavers, quotes wallpapers and forum. Continue for our current list of the Funny Quotations
Funny Quotations
- I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.Rating: 0/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny
- I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.Rating: 3/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny
- I like nonsense, it awakens the brain cells.Rating: 0/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny
- I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.Rating: 0/5 Author: Jerome K Jerome Subject: Funny
- I love deadlines. I especially love the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.Rating: 5/5 Author: Douglas Adams Subject: Funny
- I love your smile, your face, and your eyes - ****, I'm good at telling lies!Rating: 2/5 Author: A. A. Attanasio Subject: Funny
- I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.Rating: 0/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny
- I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.Rating: 0/5 Author: David Bissonnette Subject: Funny
- I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer.Rating: 0/5 Author: Douglas Adams Subject: Funny
- I see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming.Rating: 4/5 Author: A. A. Attanasio Subject: Funny
- I shot an elephant in my pajamas. What he was doing in my pajamas, I'll never know.Rating: 1/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny
- I speak twelve languages. English is the bestest.Rating: 2/5 Author: Stefan Bergman Subject: Funny
- I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.Rating: 4/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny
- I was sued by a woman who claimed that she became pregnant because she watched me on television and I bent her contraceptive coil. Rating: 5/5 Author: Uri Geller Subject: Funny
- I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect!Rating: 0/5 Author: Unknown Subject: Funny